Tuesday, March 12, 2013

God Loves Us in Spite of Our Circumstances


This past Sunday, as it was snowing, and the wind blowing hard outside, I received a call at the church asking if our church was having services in spite of the dreadful weather outside.  I said we were still on, at which point, I was asked If someone could come pick up the caller.  

I have to say, my first reaction wasn't “sure, let me leave the comforts of the church and come get you”, but before I finished that thought, the caller mentioned that I would have to drive his van as he was in a wheelchair and since his grandmother didn’t want to brave the weather, I would have to drive their vehicle.

 Now, I was able to finish my thought about "sure, let me leave the comforts"………., but now I was able to add to this sentiment with the new found information about having to leave the comforts of my vehicle and warm up another vehicle also.  

After rounding up my wife to drive me (thank you dear) we proceeded to Johnny's house.    I have to say, over the next couple hours in the limited discussion I had with him, I was so blessed to have met him and just wanted to share with you my experience. 

Let me start by the knock at the door, and seeing Johnny for the first time, not was he just in a wheelchair, he was totally dependent on his caretaker for everything.  So, let me just do a shout out and say, God Bless his “grandmother” for taking on this responsibility for Johnny  but for all of you that God has called into this mission, to have compassion and a desire to care for all those who are dependent on you for everything. 

As we started talking, he began by saying he “needed” to go to church, and since his church cancelled services, he wanted to fulfill a promise he had made years before when he had attended Central. 

First, he mentioned that when he had visited the first time, he was well received, and always remembered that, and secondly, he said that as some had expressed hope that he would return, he said that he would.  He felt he was honoring that commitment this past Sunday.

Scripture says, let your yes, be yes, and your no, no.  There is probably not one person at Central that remembered his commitment, but he did, and he felt obligated to honor that commitment. 

Pastor Ryan has been speaking about commitment to our marriage/relationships the last few weeks – are we committed to our word as Johnny demonstrated this past week.

I don’t blame anyone for not venturing out this past Sunday due to the inclement weather, but what other lesson did I hear from Johnny about coming to church.  He “needed” to attend church because if he didn’t, his week just wasn't the same, it got the week started wrong if he wasn't in church.  Say what!  

I am concerned whether I shoot 50% playing basketball, or whether I can score 1 point from Jeff Burbank in racquetball, but Johnny knows he needs to be at church on Sunday’s, or his week will not be right.  

Wow, what excuses do we use to skip out of church each week, or helping at Awana, or ...?????

This reminds me of another service I attended years ago where a girl in a wheelchair who couldn't speak, walk, talk, move, started making noises in the back of the church and to the pastor’s credit, he stopped as she used her device to spell out “How Happy she was” – once again, Say What!?!?!?!!! 

How is something like that even possible when we beat ourselves up for our past sins and the life we live?

We can’t accept God’s Grace, can’t rely on God’s promises and then continue in our own self-pity, and then use that for an excuse to skip out at church.  Some of us need to do some serious soul searching and draw a line in the sand and say, enough is enough, ask for help, and then start taking the small steps needed to be committed and honor your commitments. 

If that wasn't enough, what an awful week for Johnny to visit our church.  Here he is, living with his grandmother, totally dependent on her, and probably never going to be married, and Pastor Ryan is speaking of marriage.  I was almost embarrassed to bring him after seeing his disability and knowing what the message was going to be. 

 However, on the way back to his home, he brought up the message, and said while he will never be married and he may not have agreed with everything that was said, he learned/heard of some things that he can use in his own relationships that he does have.  

Once again, he didn’t turn a deft ear on the message after hearing things he didn’t agree with about marriage, he kept listening, and was able to hear what God was speaking through this marriage message, to apply to his own life.

Thank you Johnny for reminding me, it isn't our circumstances that determine the who we are, it is knowing how much God loves us in spite of our circumstances!

-Stan Bream

7 Ways to Earn Respect from Your Wife

The following was taken from the All Pro Dad Website.  You can see the original article here:
 http://www.allprodad.com/articles/dads-and-marriage/7-ways-to-earn-respect-from-your-wife/

Enjoy,
-Pastor Ryan


7 Ways to Earn Respect from Your Wife


A well-known cliché declares, “All that women really want is to be loved, and all that men really want is to be respected.”

Generalizations are seldom ironclad, but it follows that men who love their wives tend to be respected, and that women who respect their husbands tend to receive love. It’s also true that the best way to get what we need from our wife is to both give her what she needs and to give her what we need.
Respect is a huge issue for men in twenty-first century America, and when men don’t feel respected, they don’t always handle it well. Mostly, respect is something we have to earn. It can’t be taken, and it doesn’t just fall out of the sky. Here are 7 ways to earn your wife’s respect.

Treat her with respect:
Make sure your wife knows how much you value and appreciate her. Don’t take a chance on this.  Express it often. 

Never demand respect:
When we raise our voice, berate, bully, and otherwise posture or attempt to coerce respect, then we’re moving in exactly the wrong direction.

Be a servant-leader in your home:
When men demonstrate humility, grace, and mercy at home, the strength of character that defines them as servant-leaders commands the kind of respect that is rooted in love and appreciation.
Consistently put other people first, including her:
Leaders who act like they are the most important person in the room get both obedience and rebellion. But leaders who put others first tend to be followed and loved. Are you putting her first? Read here on how to tell what's most important to you. 

Always follow through on your promises:
One indicator of integrity is a consistent level of follow-through when it comes to keeping promises. And a byproduct of integrity is respect. If your wife knows where you stand, and she can expect you to follow-through, then respect is part of the package.

Volunteer in the community:
Help organize a neighborhood cleanup, become active in the PTA, join a team at church, help out with your kids’ sports teams. Take consistent time and trouble to lift others up.

Carry your weight around the house:
Quietly, yet consistently, be a more visible, viable, and valuable member of your own household. That might mean taking responsibility for the kids’ homework, staying on top of the laundry backlog, being a leader in terms of respecting on-time dinner, organizing cleanup every other day, or being “chores king” every Saturday. The possibilities are endless, but the principle is the same. Here's an article to help remind you 
What Your Wife is Worth.

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