7 Ways to Earn Respect from Your Wife

The following was taken from the All Pro Dad Website.  You can see the original article here:
 http://www.allprodad.com/articles/dads-and-marriage/7-ways-to-earn-respect-from-your-wife/

Enjoy,
-Pastor Ryan

7 Ways to Earn Respect from Your Wife

A well-known cliché declares, “All that women really want is to be loved, and all that men really want is to be respected.”

Generalizations are seldom ironclad, but it follows that men who love their wives tend to be respected, and that women who respect their husbands tend to receive love. It’s also true that the best way to get what we need from our wife is to both give her what she needs and to give her what we need.
Respect is a huge issue for men in twenty-first century America, and when men don’t feel respected, they don’t always handle it well. Mostly, respect is something we have to earn. It can’t be taken, and it doesn’t just fall out of the sky. Here are 7 ways to earn your wife’s respect.

Treat her with respect:
Make sure your wife knows how much you value and appreciate her. Don’t take a chance on this.  Express it often. 

Never demand respect:
When we raise our voice, berate, bully, and otherwise posture or attempt to coerce respect, then we’re moving in exactly the wrong direction.

Be a servant-leader in your home:
When men demonstrate humility, grace, and mercy at home, the strength of character that defines them as servant-leaders commands the kind of respect that is rooted in love and appreciation.
Consistently put other people first, including her:
Leaders who act like they are the most important person in the room get both obedience and rebellion. But leaders who put others first tend to be followed and loved. Are you putting her first? Read here on how to tell what's most important to you. 

Always follow through on your promises:
One indicator of integrity is a consistent level of follow-through when it comes to keeping promises. And a byproduct of integrity is respect. If your wife knows where you stand, and she can expect you to follow-through, then respect is part of the package.

Volunteer in the community:
Help organize a neighborhood cleanup, become active in the PTA, join a team at church, help out with your kids’ sports teams. Take consistent time and trouble to lift others up.

Carry your weight around the house:
Quietly, yet consistently, be a more visible, viable, and valuable member of your own household. That might mean taking responsibility for the kids’ homework, staying on top of the laundry backlog, being a leader in terms of respecting on-time dinner, organizing cleanup every other day, or being “chores king” every Saturday. The possibilities are endless, but the principle is the same. Here's an article to help remind you What Your Wife is Worth.

© 2013 All Pro Dad. All Rights Reserved. Family First, All Pro Dad, iMOM, and Family Minute with Mark Merrill are registered trademarks.

Just Do It!

Just Do It!

Recently, I went to Wal-Mart.  I had a cart full of things so I went into a checkout lane to purchase them.  There was another customer ahead of me and all of her items were on the conveyor belt. The cashier picked up each item, scanned it, and put her items into a bag. By repeating this over and over, it created space on the conveyor belt. When the conveyor belt was half empty, I reached over it to get the gray plastic stick which is used to separate two customer’s items and began putting my items on the conveyor belt. When I did this, no one questioned what I was doing and when all of the items placed before the plastic stick were gone, the cashier hit the total button and completed the transaction for the customer before me. The cashier did not come upon the plastic stick and question what it was there for. She just knew what it meant and behaved accordingly.

That grey plastic stick has authority.  A piece of rectangular shaped, grey plastic has the authority to let the cashier know which items are one customer’s and which ones are another customer’s. In that scenario, all three of us, the customer ahead of me, the cashier and I, obeyed the authority of that grey stick.

That’s when it hit me.  No one questioned the authority of the grey stick, yet we question the authority of the Bible.  We all obeyed the grey stick, yet we fail to obey God’s word.  How wrong is that?

God didn’t offer his words as mere suggestions or nice words to listen to. Ryan shared James 1:22 with us during his sermon.  “Remember, it is a message to obey, not just to listen to. So don’t fool yourselves. For if a person just listens and doesn't obey, he is like a man looking at his face in the mirror; as soon as he walks away, he can’t see himself anymore or remember what he looks like.  But if anyone keeps looking steadily into God’s law for free men, he will not only remember it, but he will do what it says and God will greatly bless him in everything that he does.”  John 14:21 says, “The one who obeys me is the one who loves me; and because he loves me, my Father will love him; and I will too, and I will reveal myself to you.”

Neither verse says that we have to obey but then God is going to leave us high and dry to figure it all out on our own. No! God assures us that when we walk in obedience He will be right beside us, loving us, blessing us, and revealing Himself to us.

At Tuesday’s Truth Project study, Nick asked us to discuss in our groups the things we have changed because the Bible has told us to and what things we still struggle with even though we know what the Bible says. I shared that I wanted to have a blessed marriage so I read what the Bible said about respecting my husband. I’ll admit that I’m not perfect, but I am really trying. I have held my tongue and I have re-framed my words to be encouraging and respectful to build him up instead of using hurtful words to tear him down.

But…

I struggle with wanting to be liked by everyone and I tend to do things that make me popular with people now, rather than waiting for my stored treasures in Heaven.  So, when co-workers are gossiping and making judgments against others, it is really easy to chime in. It’s a popular way for women to bond. But God isn't asking us to do what’s popular. He says, “Do not conform to this world, but instead, be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  (Romans 12:2) My Bible’s version says, “Do not copy the behavior and customs of this world, but be a new and different person with a fresh newness in all you do and think. Then you will learn from your own experience how his ways will really satisfy you.”

I have learned from my own experience that there really is no “Easy Button” to get it started.  Other than knowing His word, there isn't anything to do to prepare- you just have to do it.  You have to make up your mind that this is what you are going to do, and then just do it.

I used to say that I couldn't run even if my child was on fire and I had a bucket of water.  But, I envied people who could and as a healthy young person, there is no earthly reason why I can’t run. So, I just made up my mind one day that I was going to start. I got on a treadmill and after a brief warm up, I increased the speed until I was running. After a few seconds, my shins were burning, my side hurt, and I was out of breath. I kind of thought I was going to die, but I kept at it for a whole 90 seconds. Then I slowed down and walked for a while and then ran again for another 90 seconds. Now, 3 minutes doesn’t seem like much, but the point is that I did it and when I was done, I felt terrific! I had more energy the next day and I really felt like I accomplished something.

The same is true when you pick something that you struggle with and decide that you are going to obey what the Bible says about it. In the midst of having to do or not do your thing, it’s tough, but once it’s over, you feel like you've accomplished something. The best part is knowing that Christ is right beside you rejoicing at your accomplishment, ready to pour out His blessing.

So, think about the things that you have already overcome with the help of the Holy Spirit living inside you, and then use that as encouragement to overcome whatever it is you still struggle with. Then, make up your mind that that is what you are going to do and just do it!

-Angie Baack

2013... Time for a fresh start

by Jon Sampson

Happy New Year!

As I write this, my thoughts turn to tomorrow. You see, I'm heading back to work full-time at the Daily Times Herald as a graphic designer. For those of you who've known me a long time, you'll remember I worked there from 1997-2005. So it's a bit of a homecoming for me. I appreciate the second opportunity and look forward to a fresh start and second chances.

Second chances, you may ask? One of my regrets in life was not being more open and sharing with my faith while employed at the newspaper. Plus, in my early years there, I was a little too legalistic. OK, a lot legalistic. I blew chances to really reach co-workers for Christ. This morning, I asked Jesus to help me be bold and clever at work this year. I pray that He'll give me opportunities to share Christ in love and spiritually season my speech. I ask for your prayers in this matter as well and encourage you to take up this challenge as well in your own workplace and life.

Let's make 2013 a year of growth and movement at Central!

I'll leave you with a poem I found this morning on about.com/christianity...

I tried to think of a clever new phrase—
A slogan to inspire the next 365 days,
A motto to live by this coming new year,
But the catchy words fell flat to my ear.

And then I heard His still small voice
Saying, "Consider this simple, daily choice:
With each new dawn and close of day
Make new your resolve to trust and obey."

"Don't look back caught in regret
Or dwell on the sorrow of dreams unmet;
Don't stare forward anchored by fear,
No, live in this moment, for I am here."

"I am all you need. Everything. I Am.
You are held secure by my strong hand.
Give me this one thing—your all in all;
Into my grace, let yourself fall."

So, at last I'm ready; I see the way.
It's to daily follow, trust, and obey.
I enter the new year armed with a plan,
To give him my everything. All that I am.

--Mary Fairchild

Yours in Christ,

Jon

Thoughts from the Connecticut School Shooting Tragedy

We thought we would post a couple of thoughts from two of our Church Leaders about the tragedy that occurred today at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut   We ask that you join us in praying for the families of the victims and would welcome your thoughts below.

As many of you are aware, our nation has yet again been struck by tragedy.  Many lives were lost today at an elementary school in Connecticut.  While I do not have words to express my feelings right now, I know the families of those involved in this shooting need our prayers.

I can't even begin to imagine what these parents are feeling, and my heart aches deeply for them.  This is not a time for us to debate political agendas; it is a time to pray for peace and healing to fall on all of those affected.  This goes to show that we really do need more of Jesus in this broken world.  Will you join me in praying Isaiah 40:28-31 for these families, victims and speak it loud for our nation? I know I will be hugging Chloe and Jireh a little tighter tonight. 
-Pastor Ryan

While I can be a very emotional person, tragedy in this fallen world has sometimes left me numb to express feelings, however, this tragedy in light of the book I am reading has me heartbroken and unapologetically crying for not only these families, but this nation.  I am a lucky one, I was raised by great faithful parents, however, I am confessing, I was not a great parent/husband, or even a good parent/husband, and this is why I am so heartbroken because I was not a parent/husband that I would have liked our kids to emulate.  I /we can rationalize all I want about how we are at different stages in our walk with the Lord, but, the only person holding me (us) back from walking closer is ourselves, no one else.

I know that good parenting can still result in troubled children, however, our (my) obedience to the word of God “while” I was a faithful churchgoer during the raising of our children was in all seriousness, pathetic.  This tragedy “should” make us all re-evaluate, how are we raising our children, what am I showing my children through my marriage, what seriously have I changed in my life over the last week, month, year that would make God stand up and take notice that I am serious about following him.  This isn’t about your spouse, about your children, or your neighbor, this is for “YOU” to think about and then (as Pastor Ryan says) BEG God to help you change by the power of the Holy Spirit.  As we try to evangelize this community, this is so doubly important, because we as a church live in a fishbowl.  Yes, we can’t be perfect, but even in our imperfection, do others see Christ in us to how we then respond to that imperfection.  Are we the first to apologize?  Are we the first to reach out, or are we settled into our way of life, and this is just the way it is going to be.

Tragedy brings about some change – however, as we learned with 9-11, as time goes along, things just get back to normal, and we start settling into how we always have been – may this not be the case for Central.  

-Stan Bream

Bondage Week 1- Snapshots of Your Past

Bondage Week 1- Snapshots of Your Past

How many church services do you think are blessed with so many visual props to make a point?  I don’t know about you, but when I walked in Sunday to see a 6 foot high steel cage sitting there in the middle of the stage, I couldn’t wait to see what exactly pastor had in mind.  I can’t say I would have been completely surprised if he had stepped out in wrestling tights with someone announcing “L-L-L-L-et’s get ready to R-U-M-B-L-E!”  (Ryan, feel free to use that if you run short of ideas).  

But as he began hanging up each of those pictures, it reminded me of how holding on to the past creates a barrier between us and God.  Sins of our past, if we we refuse to let them go, build a wall that prevents us from seeing God.  Imagine, if you will, that pastor had continued to post pictures of everything he had ever done against God in front of him.  Little by little, his view outside of himself would be diminished.  Pretty soon, he wouldn’t be able to see out around them at all.  He would lose sight of God.  

Who of us can claim anything different?  I certainly cannot.  When I sit down and reflect over all of the wrongs I committed against God, I wonder how he did not give up on me.  How could he possibly continue to love me as I denounced his very existence at one point in my life?  The quick answer is: he is God, and can pretty much do whatever he wants.  But for those of us that need further explanation, the answer can be found in Ephesians.  In chapter 1, verse 4, Paul writes “For he chose us in him BEFORE the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his site, IN LOVE.”  God’s love for us is so great that, even while He knew exactly how we would each fail Him, he still chose us.  So God chose us from the beginning of time, He loved us then, and His love is never-ending.    

Because of salvation, our sins are washed away--completely.  2 Cor 5:17 tells us that “if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:  The old has gone, the new is here!”.  Paul goes on to write in verse 19 “that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting peoples’ sins against them.”  Ephesians 1, vs 4 says, “In him we have redemption through his blood...”  In Romans 8:38-39, Paul confirms that nothing will stop Christ from loving us.  This includes our past sins, as well as sins that we will inevitably be guilty down the road. As pastor pointed out, the “snapshots” of our lives don’t define us,  Christ’s redemption does.  Jesus does not hold our sins against us.  Through accepting Him, we are cleansed.  His blood washes away every one of those pictures of our past we are holding onto.  WE ARE FORGIVEN!   So if Christ does not hold what we’ve done against us, what right do we have of not letting go? 

So how do we avoid allowing our guilt of sinning to interfere with our future in Christ?  In Phillipians 3:13, Paul explains, “But one thing I do:  Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.”  If we focus on how we have failed to follow the Word, we lose sight of God and his future for us.  By allowing those snap shots to collect and multiply, we become distracted, and barriers are formed between our hearts and God.  Satan certainly loves it when we do this.  It’s guaranteed that he’s right there beside each of us, striving to remind us how short we fall. We must avoid allowing our past to prevent us from moving ahead in Christ.  We must resist the subtle reminders that satan loves to insert into our thoughts.  Because, as pastor put it, if we obsess about the voice of the enemy, we cannot hear the voice of God. 

  Lord God, thank you for not giving up on us.  You knew every sin that we would commit, you knew every time we would fail to keep you in our hearts, even before we were born.  Yet you still created us. You allow to go through those times, and never give up on us.  Thank You!   You were always and will always be there.

What snapshots are in your life?  Take time to reflect on anything that might be obscuring your view of God, and ask Him for the power to let it go.  Please feel free to share in whatever way you are lead.  Comments, critiques are always welcomed.  

--Jim

What Do You Follow?

Watching, listening and talking to people the last several weeks leading up to the election has been a real eye opener for me.  Don’t worry, I’m not going to espouse the virtues of one candidate or the other.  I’m not going to try and tell you which party to support and vote for.  But what I have found interesting is that a lot of people base their beliefs on preconceived notions that are in no way based on fact.  

These notions are many times fallacies generations old and sometimes planted in us by our parents, a friend, mentor and/or the media, or maybe it’s simply just what we want to believe.  But when people are told fact, and it contradicts those preconceived notions they either react w/anger or just simply turn a deaf ear. 

It doesn't matter how much proof is presented.  I have found this in politics as well as in the church.  In my few short years in church leadership, it has disappointed me to see people walk away from a church, from close relationships, even family, because they were told something they did not want to hear.  It is human nature to gravitate towards the things that “Tickle our ears”.  Things that make us feel good.  “Please tell me what I want to hear!”  But how can we expect to grow if we are following falsehoods? 

Hosea 4:6 “Is God’s charge against the nation of Israel…:“my people are destroyed from lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also reject you as my priests; because you have ignored the law of your God, I also will ignore your children.” 

I truly believe we are a people, a nation, a world that is being destroyed due to a lack of knowledge.  The truth is not always palatable, but I would rather swallow a bitter medicine and be saved than feast on candy (or Taco Johns) and die. 

I need to add here that we are given the task of studying so that we know what and why we believe.  We are not to blindly trust.  Question everything.  Take it to the Word of God.  Take it to Him in prayer.  The Bible says that the enemy will appear as an angel of light.  We can be so easily swayed by the “pretty music” others share, but don’t get caught swallowing the hook.   

John 8:32  “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” 

God loves us.  He wants us to be healed, set free and saved.  Open your hearts to God’s truth.

-Koze

Solomon's Temple

By Angela Noble

Dear Church Family,

 

I usually receive a daily bible verse via email and a couple of days ago it was 1 Kings 9:1, "Now it came about when Solomon had finished building the house of the LORD, and the king's house, and all that Solomon desired to do."  This verse inspired me to Google Solomon's Temple and try to find the verses that held the description of the temple itself.  This led me to 1 Kings 6, where the physical characteristics of the temple are described and the building process.  With God’s instruction, Solomon had built a grand and lavish temple, filled with floors of gold, grand cherub statues and intricately carved designs on huge olive wood doors.  This magnificent structure took seven years to be built, each item handcrafted and then brought to the location.  As a lover of historic buildings, how awesome it would have been to see such grandeur and splendor.  A temple designed by God, but hand-crafted by men. 

 

We, at Central Christian, also have a temple.  It is our building just east of town on Highway 30.  Now….it doesn’t have gold over-laid flooring…it has carpet…. and it doesn’t have any intricately carved designs on the walls or doors.  I’m pretty sure the walls are mostly made of drywall and probably factory wood doors.  However, it is still God’s house….a place where we come together and worship and learn to be better followers of Christ.  How grateful I am that we have a building to come to on Sundays and other days of the week.  For those members that have been here for over 4 years, you know that it wasn’t always the case. 

 

As the church continues to grow and the building is used more and more for various outreach ministries, it is going to become increasingly important to maintain it properly.  The Church Cleaning Ministry is an important part of making sure Central’s temple is maintained and is able to continue to support the children, adults, members, attenders and guests that will be coming and going throughout the week.  I would like to ask if there is anyone out there who would be willing to spend a couple hours a month to dedicate towards maintaining the building’s interior.   I need a couple of individuals, families, or groups to commit to clean for 1 week a month for next 6 months.  Tina Boell and I clean the first full week of every month and will continue to do that.  The total time I spend that week cleaning is only 2-2.5 hours.  If anyone is willing to do that…..please email me at anoble227@yahoo.com so that I may get a calendar together for the next 6 months.  The time commitment is small and I have to confess that I probably spend more time a week watching TV than it takes me to clean the church!

 

Thank you in advance for your help…..I really, really, really need it!

 

Angela Noble

anoble227@yahoo.com